My Parenting Successes and Failures (So Far)

My baby is only two and a half months old, and I am already counting the ways I’m screwing this up. To try to prevent myself from slipping further into the depths of postpartum depression, I thought I’d list some things I think I got right, too.

Failures:

  • Lullabies: I often find myself rocking my baby to sleep in a silent, zombie-like stupor or whispering variations on “Please be quiet. Please go to sleep.” Hey, at least I’m teaching him to be polite!
  • Crying. I have no patience for all the crying. Enough already! (He’s probably thinking the same thing about me…)
  • Schedules. It really irks me when baby is late for a nap. Het baby, get a watch! Time to sleep!
  • Sleeping. I haven’t gotten him to sleep in a bassinet or crib yet, but it took him nine months to transition from sleeping in the womb to sleeping out in the world, so I’m cutting myself some slack on that.

Successes:

  • Feeding. I provide a pretty fantastic cup of breastmilk, if I do say so myself. At least he hasn’t complained so far. Granted the container must be pretty appealing since I haven’t given him a bottle yet (add that to the list of failures).
  • Diapers. I can change a diaper in about 15 seconds flat. Go me! Is there some competition like the hot dog eating contest I can enter with skills like these?
  • Smiling. I am willing to embarrass the heck out of myself if it  will get my baby to crack a smile. From ridiculous voices to silly dance moves to funny faces. Whatever a mom’s got to do to get a laugh.
  • Selfless love. Although I’m missing movies with friends, concerts, races, or even meals here and there, I honestly don’t mind at all because it means I get to spend more time holding my baby, seeing his face, hearing his laugh, and simply loving him more than I ever thought was possible.
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